Extinguish the Ex | Ask April

Extinguish the Ex | Ask April

Posted on February 25 2015

april mansini of askapril.comThe ex of our lovers are always the ones we despise. How do we deal with them? What if they are gorgeous? We turned to our beloved customer April Masinin for help because when April Mansini was looking for a new set of bandage dresses she turned to The Kewl Shop. We were more than happy to oblige and she ended up with eight beautiful dresses and three tight skirts.


If you are out of the loop here is April's short bio.

April Masini is the author of four relationship advice books, the 'Ask April' advice column and the advice forum where over 20,000 questions have been asked and answered; she has more than 1.3 million Twitter followers and 560,000 Facebook fans. April has appeared as a featured guest on the The O'Reilly Factor, hosted Everything You Need to Know About Sex and been interviewed for over 10,000 articles, radio and television shows, including those on ABC, CBS, FOX, MSN, Yahoo!, CNN, BBC, Univision, Telemundo, Agence France Press — US News & World Report, Wall Street Journal, New York Times, New York Daily News, Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, Forbes, New York Post, Washington Post, Christian Science Monitor, Men’s Health, Women’s Health, Glamour, Woman’s Day, Yahoo!, Huffington Post, The Associated Press, TIME, Brides, Maxim, Cosmopolitan, and USA Today, among others.


Dear April,

I’m in an 18 month relationship with this amazing guy, but something keeps bugging me — his ex. The girl he was dating before me for six months (it wasn’t a real relationship, more a have sex and hang out relationship) is everything you don’t want your boyfriend’s ex to be. She is funny, social, popular and beautiful. The fact that he still keeps in touch with her hurts me. He texts her every once in a while, talks to her at parties and it makes me jealous and insecure. I've talked to him about it and he said there is nothing to worry about. The next time we saw her he ignored her for my sake but I heard later on that he apologized to her about ignoring her and said he would never do it again and that I wouldn’t change that. Also he wanted to keep their conversations a secret because he didn’t want me to know because it would be unfair to me. I love him so much, but why does he feel the need to keep in touch?! 


Extinguish the ex

Dear Extinguish the ex: 

Your boyfriend is in touch with his ex because he wants to be. And rather than telling him that it upsets you or that you're insecure, you'll do better with these two pieces of advice:

1. Don't make a big deal out of something that isn't. If you create a problem where there is none, you'll have done just that -- created a problem. Clearly, he's holding on to her for some reason, and if you start handing out ultimatums, you're going to end up with more stress, and possibly a break up reason down the line. You may not like this, but telling him about it isn't going to help your cause. 

2. Compete for his attention. Men will go where they feel good, and if he feels good when he's with her, you can expect him to go there. So.... with that knowledge, make him feel good about being with you! Instead of turning into a mother with a bunch of rules where he can and can't go and be, make it more enticing for him to be with you.

Recommended Reading

12 Reasons Women Need to Deadlift

When it comes to workout regimes, there is limitless variety and options avai...

11 Workout Mistakes That Are Hurting Your Fitness Goals

A healthy and toned body is what we all aim for when putting on sexy bandage ...

How to Eat Healthy on a Budget

Given the hectic yet sedentary lifestyles that most of us lead, eating health...

16 Style Tips on What to Wear to a Holiday Party

It is October already, and this means that the fun part of the year is just b...

9 Girl Reasons to Lift Weights

“I am not incorporating weight lifting into my workout routine because I do n...

11 Tips on How to Eat Well for Busy Women

Crazy rush in the mornings, close deadlines, stress-filled meetings at work, ...

11 Ways to Wear Your Hair This Fall

The fall of 2016 is upon us and you know what that means—it’s time to style o...

Kewl News: Fashion Recap for September

So September is over, and we are already into the first week of October – tem...

8 Sexy Halloween Costume Ideas & Makeup

With Halloween just around the corner, you must be on the lookout for the per...

comments powered by Disqus

What's Hot Right Now

Join our Mailing List

Sign up to receive our daily email and get 50% off your first purchase.