What To Do When She Doesn't Text You Back

Last updated on : July 29 2021

Man texting

Article Summary

If a girl isn't responding to your texts, whether she likes you or not, the best thing to do is nothing because doing nothing will always leave you winning.

Click on the links below to learn more.



Why Should You Do NOTHING

But Doing NOTHING Is Hard To Do

Bonus Section - Why Chasing Someone Or Telling Them How You Feel Is A Bad Idea



This article explains what you should do when a girl you've recently met does not respond to your text message. In essence, you should do nothing, and we explain in detail why. 

However, the advice is good advice for girls too, when a guy doesn't text you back. Also, you can apply it to most other relationships, including friends and family. 


Picture the scene - you've met the girl of your dreams, had a great first date, but when you start to text her, the worst thing imaginable happens, she doesn't text you back. 

You thought you were getting on with this girl, but now you're unsure, and you're crushed. 

When a girl doesn't text you back, you might feel like you've failed. But in reality, there might be a thousand reasons why she isn't texting, from being too busy, to even being too shy.  

The best way to find out is to follow a set of simple rules that will leave you in a solid position to either resume your relationship with her or, at worst, to walk away.

But first, forget the idea that there is some magical text you can send her to get a response, make her more attractive to you, or make her fall deeply in love with you. These types of text messages do not exist because girls are just not that simple. 

Instead, believe that the best thing you can do is absolutely NOTHING. And we'll explain why below.

Why Should You Do NOTHING

When a girl doesn't text you back, doing nothing leaves you in a win-win position. Let's go through the different scenarios to make this clear to you.

Scenario A: She Is Interested In You And You Do Nothing

If she's interested in you and doesn't text you back when you expect her to, you are better off waiting until she does, in other words, doing nothing.

She might be busy or focusing on something else, or she might be testing you. Either way, if you double text her, she might think you are impatient or needy and could lose what interest she has in you already.   

However, if you do nothing, the fact that you haven't double texted her or tried too hard to get her attention could make her more interested in you. And leave you in a stronger position when she does text you back. 

Doing nothing will also make you stand out from other guys who might be in contact with her. Why? Because most guys will be double texting and showing no restraint at all.   

So when a girl is interested in you but taking her time to respond to your text messages, the best thing to do is nothing and wait. If you don't wait for her text and prod her with a double-text, you risk her losing interest in you. 

If you do wait for her text, you'll spike her curiosity and demonstrate your inner strength, leaving you in a stronger position. 

Girl responding to a text

Scenario B: She Is Not Interested In You And You Do Nothing

If she's not interested in you and doesn't text you back, you are better off not chasing her in any way, double texts included. 

Chasing her will not make her like you more. Indeed, it could turn her off more than you think because you will come across as impatient, irritating and needy, and possibly even unstable. 

Not only does chasing show a lack of internal strength, but allowing yourself to be rejected time after time is not suitable for your mental health and well-being.   

You are also training yourself to be needy if you chase and show no resolve. 

So if a girl isn't interested in you, the best thing to do is nothing, and not waste your time and energy chasing someone likely to reject you. 

If you can train yourself not to pursue, you'll come across as more attractive to women in the future and feel better about yourself.  

But Doing NOTHING Is Hard To Do

Yes, doing nothing is hard to do. Girls know how hard it is for you not to send them a text when you are interested. 

And this is why doing nothing will make her more interested in you, curious about the internal strength you possess to show the patience needed to wait. 

Doing nothing shows a lot of good things about you. It also helps you build resolve and will make you more attractive to other women you meet in the future. 

If you struggle to do nothing and can't stop yourself from double-texting or chasing, you could suffer from self-esteem and neediness issues. Learn to beat these unappealing issues fast

As a compromise, try waiting at least seven days before sending a follow-up text. This way, you show some patience and give her another opportunity to think about you. However, if she doesn't respond to this follow-up, there can be no more exceptions, and you must not chase her. 

Bonus Section - Why Chasing Someone Or Telling Them How You Feel Is A Bad Idea

There is no magical text or thing you can do to make someone like you if they're not interested in you, so you're better off not wasting your time and energy on someone who is not interested

You might think chasing a girl or telling her how you feel will make her like you more or win her over.  

However, telling her how you feel is entirely unrelated to how she feels about you, and she could find this behavior smothering and a sign of weakness in you. 

You are also pleading for a positive response from her by telling her how you feel, demonstrating a severe lack of internal strength, which could quickly push her away. And, you are placing her on a pedestal, causing her to lose respect for you fast. 

So do not chase someone or profess feelings for someone when they show no interest in you. Instead, wait for them to show some interest in you first.  

If they do, then instead of chasing, lead the relationship and the conversation like she expects you to. 


Strong guy texting

If a girl isn't responding to your texts, whether she likes you or not, the best thing to do is nothing because doing nothing will always leave you winning.

If she likes you, give her the time to respond when she is ready instead of chasing her with follow-up texts. She'll appreciate you more when you behave like this. 

If she doesn't like you and isn't responding to your text, then you are better off not wasting any further time or effort chasing her.

In other words, doing nothing leaves you a winner, whether the girl likes you or not. 

Lastly, learn to understand that chasing or telling someone how you feel is not a good idea and is likely to lead to them losing respect and interest in you - quite the opposite of what you want.

Frequently Asked Questions

Here are the questions most frequently asked by our readers.

1. Why hasn't she texted me back?

There could be various reasons, such as being busy, not wanting to appear too eager, simply forgetting to respond, or perhaps she's ghosting you. Don't jump to conclusions too quickly. 

2. How long should I wait before following up?

Respect her time and space, and avoid bombarding her with multiple messages. It's best to wait for her to contact you. Otherwise, we recommend waiting at least seven days. 

3. What should I say in the follow-up message?

Keep it light and casual. A simple, "Hey, just checking in. Hope everything's alright with you?" can suffice. Avoid sounding needy or demanding.

4. What if she still doesn't respond?

It's essential to respect her choice and give her the space she needs; and so it's best to leave her alone. Avoid pressuring her or making assumptions about her intentions.

5. Should I confront her about not responding?

Absolutely not. Confrontation can often be counterproductive and is potentially rude or intimidating.

6. Is it okay to double text?

Double texting is generally not okay. It opens you up to further rejection and could have her thinking of you as needy or desperate. 

7. How can I manage my expectations in this situation?

Keep an open mind and understand that people have different communication styles. Practice patience and focus on maintaining a healthy balance in your interactions.

8. What if she's consistently unresponsive?

If you follow the advice in this article, she'll either be responding to you, or you will have moved on. 

Author Bio

Author carved in wood

Hello, I'm Charles, and I'm the proud owner of this blog. For more than a decade, I've been deeply involved in the world of relationship blogging, exploring the intricate and often fascinating dynamics of human connections.

Together with my dedicated YouTube channel, I've had the privilege of guiding numerous individuals through the challenging and sometimes tumultuous path of heartbreak. It's been incredibly rewarding to witness these individuals emerge from their struggles even stronger and more resilient than before.

My work is not just about relationships; it's about personal growth and self-improvement. It's about fostering a mindset that encourages fulfilling relationships and empowers individuals to strive towards becoming the best versions of themselves. This philosophy resonates deeply within everything I do.

Be sure to explore my YouTube channel for more insightful content and the opportunity to share your thoughts in the comments section.

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